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Traditions (Rox Delaney)
My memories of some things reach back to when I was three years old. (Funny how I can't remember what happened two days ago!) It's been almost six decades since I was that age, so I've seen traditions shift and change, many times. I expect to continue to watch them for a few more years.
My earlier blog post this month was about Thanksgivings (and Christmases) when I was a child and visiting my great-aunts' homes for the holidays. Those traditions lasted through my high school years, although we did move closer and didn't have to drive what I'd thought as a child was hours and hours. But as the elders of the family began to pass away, and those my age began to grow into adults, new traditions were made. I married, and my husband's family attended Thanksgiving at his aunt and uncle's house. Each year we went there, along with my parents, who had been invited, since I was their only child. I still missed my cousins, but I was a grown-up and fell into those grown-up ways, taking my own prepared dishes to share with husband's family.
Trouble brewed in the family, and we stopped going to his aunt and uncle's, and we no longer spent the holidays with his family. My mother brought the turkey to our house in the big electric roaster, and I fixed the rest of Thanksgiving dinner. By that time we had three small daughters, so the table was full. Even after my dad's death, we continued with this "new" tradition.
Along came a divorce, meaning more major changes. My mother still fixed the turkey, but holiday meals were with my grown and nearly grown children and often included their friends, female and male. Add one granddaughter to the mix, and the family grew. Add two more, and two husbands, and we expanded even larger. I started making the main dishes, and daughters filled in with others. My mother has been gone for a couple of Thanksgivings, and we've again shifted traditions to suit our growing family. There's now me, four daughters, two sons-in-law, one SO/fiance, five grandkids and one step-granddaughter. Sometimes we get together for our dinner late on Thanksgiving evening. Some years we've enjoyed our dinner on Saturday. This year we happened to do it on Thanksgiving afternoon. What a novel idea! And this year, one son-in-law offered to fry a turkey. It was so good, I think I'll pass the turkey job to him from now on!
The one thing I learned along the way, and I'm sure others here have to, was to not make my daughters feel they must spend their holidays with me. We always manage to find a time when we can all be together, even if one or two can only make late dessert. Our guessing game of where and when we'll have dinner has actually become a new tradition! And I'm sure there'll be more.
Blessings to everyone during this holiday season, and I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!!
Thanksgiving Feasts (Melissa Robbins)
This is my favorite Thanksgiving photograph. I'm the kid on the left. My sister is on the right. Her face cracks me up every time. "Ew! What is that?" No, she is not a vegetarian.
Growing up, Thanksgivings were a big deal and my grandmother would make a feast. She would have turkey and ham, those cute rolls that look like bums (The things we remember as kids!), and desserts galore. My grandparents had a large garden, so creamed corn, green beans, Melissa Pickles, and other delicious vegetables made it on the table. Melissa Pickles? These were pickles my grandparents spent all summer making from cucumbers from their garden. I know this because I was there too during the summer and put to work. All those green beans being eaten were snapped by me. Anyway, Melissa Pickles were called Melissa Pickles because I loved them so much. They were not your typical pickles. They were sweet, cubed, and bright green. I just have to say I was really disappointed later in life when I discovered the bright green color came from food coloring. I thought it was some super special ingredient. I have the recipe for Melissa Pickles, but I know zero about canning and are afraid to try canning them.
Sadly, since moving to the Midwest in 1999, I have not celebrated a Thanksgiving with my family. Instead, my husband, our children, and I travel to Arkansas to eat and play football with Reed's great-aunt (a hoot of a woman) and her family.
This year, Thanksgiving will be extra special. It will be our daughter, Gwinn's first Thanksgiving. Babies are always fun to have around the holidays. We also have the pleasure of sharing our traditions with our exchange student from Germany. I'm curious what she will think of green bean casserole and sweet potato casserole.
My Most Memorable Thanksgiving (Penny Rader)
On the way from the hospital to our delayed T-day dinner (yes...back then they didn't kick you out of the hospital within 24-48 hours), a severe migraine hit me fast and hard. Mom already had my other children at her house. Unable to function, I had to leave my newborn daughter with her. I knew Emily and the kids were in excellent hands and that my entire family was there to help, but I still felt like the worst mommy in the world.
My husband drove me home, which at that time was only a few short miles from my parents' house, helped me with my prescription, tucked me into bed...and went after some propane. Yep. The propane tank had emptied and the house was freezing. I buried my head under the covers and let the medication do its thing. Many hours later we went back for the kids. I snuggled up with my new baby and hoped she would forgive me for abandoning her on her first day out of the hospital.
This year Emily's birthday is three days before Thanksgiving, but the day after my family is having our Thanksgiving dinner. Happy birthday, baby girl! I love you more than I can say.
I''m Getting Cynical About the Holidays
Thanksgiving
Instead of focusing on the past, no matter how wonderful they are, for the past fourteen years, I have strived to create memories for my daughters to cherish when they have their own children one day.
I continue to make certain treats such as sweet potato pie, but our traditions include: putting up the Christmas decorations on Thanksgiving weekend and preparing our wish list for Santa. We also include ways to help the misfortunate such as donating to the Angel Tree or to food pantries. We also go to a Christmas tree farm to pick out our tree to decorate on the Sunday before we go back to work and school.
Although it's Thanksgiving, it creates a bridge between the holiday and the one to come: Christmas and the New Year.
It may sound very simplistic. There is nothing fancy or extravagant that makes our time together extraordinary except this: the warmth of a loving home with family surrounding us. My children will have the memories that they were cherished and loved. That is the ultimate Thanksgiving gift: Families are Forver.
Happy Thanksgiving and blessings to each of you.
Gingerbread Houses and Family Memories
One of my favorite memories at Thanksgiving time involves a tradition my sister started when her kids were toddlers. On the day after Thanksgiving we make gingerbread houses. Usually the participants include my sister (Tami), her two kids (Ashley and Chris), me (biggest kid of all), my daughter (Angie), and sometimes our youngest brother (Pat). Angie flies back for Thanksgiving, and again for Christmas. I think sometimes she would be okay without this traditional time of making a HUGE mess, but she tolerates it because the rest of us love it.
Personally, I'm glad this tradition is also traditionally done at my sister's house. When we started this amazingly messy annual project, Tami used to make all of the gingerbread and Pat, Angie and I would cut the pieces. Then, if we were really lucky, the pieces would bake without burning and we would get them to the table without breaking them...at least too many of them. The last few years we've moved on to buying the kits. Although we only use pieces of the kits. We add a ton of candy and other stuff not included. Basically, we still make a huge mess.
But, mess or not, we have a great time doing this. There are smiles all around, good-natured teasing, and just a lot of love shared. We've thought about stopping now that Tami's "kids" are 13 and 15...but they keep wanting to do it. And I certainly don't want to grow up and stop having all this fun.
The photo included is from 9 years ago. Ashley is the round-faced redhead. The blonde is my pride and joy, Angie. Oh, I forget...now that she is grown up and a professional career person, she goes by Angela. Except to her mother, who refuses to adapt.
Staying Alive
Thanksgiving Memories (Rox)
My mom was the designated turkey baker, and I'd wake up on Thanksgiving morning surround by the aroma of turkey. I doubt we ever missed the Macy's Christmas Parade back then, even as we packed up the turkey and other delights to head down the road to our holiday destination. Everyone brought something to eat. Aunt Dorothy's chocolate pie was always in high demand. At her house, there was a huge solid wood table where the grown ups all sat. There were usually at least a dozen of them, laughing and talking as they passed around the food. Kids sat at card tables, sometimes on Sears catalogs to boost us to the right height.
When dinner was over and the women had cleaned up, while the men--mostly farmers--sat in the living room and talked throughout the football games, the decks of cards were pulled out of the drawer and the rousing games of pitch began. The games lasted throughout most of the afternoon and into the evening, and I can still hear the sounds of their voices, whooping and hollering at each other over each hand dealt and each card played.
But it was later in the evening that became my favorite as we grew a little older. My three female cousins and I made the table talk. Yes, you read that right. Just a few days ago we were discussing Ouija boards on this very blog, but a card table and three or four people can do the same thing. One person on each side, if possible, hands flat on the table top, and concentrating so hard, the house should've rocked, we mentally lifted the table on one side/two legs. Questions asked were usually yes or no, or sometimes involving counting. One knock for yes, two knocks for no. The adults eventually grew quiet, ending their last game of pitch to watch us. Uncle Sterl (Aunt Lucy's husband) would hoot and boo at us, convinced that one of us had to be tilting the table. We weren't. "How can we?" we'd ask, and show him that the table could rise several inches...with no legs touching the floor. He never did believe us.
I miss those holidays, and especially the talking table. We kids grew up and had kids of our own, who now have kids of their own. We made new traditions. My great-aunts, great-uncles, parents, and even a few of the older cousins are gone, but those Thanksgiving memories will always be my favorite.
Over the Hills and Through the Woods J Vincent
The snowfall steadily thickened. By the time I was finished and headed up to the house it had coated everything. It continued throughout the entire night and into the next day. Towards morning the wind picked up. It rattled the windows while snow sifted into mounds on the inside window ledges. The shushing sound wind driven makes is something like very fine sand being blown about. It made me burrow deeper beneath the heavy covers of multiple quilts. When Dad opened my door I waited for his hand to shake me but instead he told me I didn’t have to get up because there was a blizzard. I was also told to take care of my baby brothers if they woke up before he and Mom got back to the house after milking and feeding all the animals.
When my youngest brother demanded attention I reluctantly uncovered my head and crawled out of bed. It still seemed dark and with a thick frost on my bedroom window I couldn’t see out as I hurriedly dressed. It was no better in the boys’ room where I found my year-old brother jumping up and down in his crib. The two-year-old crawled out of bed and ran after me as I carried Eric down the stairs to the warmth of the kitchen—the only heated room. After getting them dressed I pulled open the back “view. When my parents and older brothers came into the house they were entirely coated with a thick layer of snow—even their faces with heavy ridges across eyebrows, nose and cheeks.
The snow continued until late that afternoon. We were kept busy with everyday inside chores as well as peeling apples and helping make three apple and three pumpkin pies to take to my aunt and uncle’s for Thanksgiving on the morrow. When we noticed that the howling of the wind had lessened we begged to go outside. Once we were swathed in layers of shirts and coats, gloves, scarves, and hats, Dad pulled open the front door and we stood, gape mouthed, at the wall of white three-fourths of the way up the screen door. The back door had a much better windbreak and we tumbled out of it only to be caught up short by the undulating snowscape. Everything was white; the garden and lawn had turned into an ocean of white waves, some of which towered over our heads.
Dad let us scamper over drifts as well as sink into them too for a time and then set us to shoveling a path to the barns. We were all exhausted that night as we crowded around the floor furnace in our pajamas to get as warm as possible before dashing up the stairs and diving into our beds.
“Boys, get down here,” Dad yelled up the stairs. “Come on, get a move on if you want to go to Thanksgiving at Uncle Romans.”
I scrambled out of bed as the boys tumbled down the stairs. Nose to the window I confirmed there was no traffic on the road to the north. Looking straight down I saw the huge drift that still blocked the garage door and those that rose and fell across the drive way. After playing on them yesterday afternoon I knew some where five feet tall. “The car isn’t doing anywhere and we aren’t either,” I muttered.
“It’s a surprise,” Dad scolded, but I saw him wink at Mom. “Wait until we’re done.”
Dad came in a few minutes later and picked up the baby and grabbed the quilts mom had set out. “Take Stan’s hand and help him. Mom will be back for him but let’s make a start. “
“Where are we going?”
“To Thanksgiving dinner,” he laughed. “Come on.”
A hank of hay sailed over the side. My oldest brother popped up. “Come on, we’ll be late to dinner, slow poke.”
“Dinner?” I looked at the huge pile of snow made when they dug a path clear for the tractor and then at the drifts in the road and shook my head.
Dad picked me up and tossed me into the pile of straw. Then he helped Mom up and over. While she settled us in the straw with the quilts to her satisfaction Dad climbed into the tractor’s seat. Revving up the engine he put the tractor in gear and we were off—straight off through the field!
SLICE OF LIFE by Reese
I’ll be up at the crack of dawn, tying on my apron, baking pecan and pumpkin pies, preparing the turkey and rolling out homemade noodles for the noon meal. My family will each bring their speciality dish to make the meal complete and then everyone divides up the leftovers for a repeat dinner the next day. Does it seem fair that we’ll work for hours in the kitchen to sit down and stuff ourselves in a matter of minutes? Probably not, but sooooo worth it. The men will then move to the living room to watch the Cowboys play and catch a few zzzzzs. The women will do the dishes and then, if it’s not too cool, we’ll head outside to sit around the fire pit on the patio. Archaic traditions I know, but it is what it is and I wouldn't change a thing about it.
Late afternoon, dessert will be served and then everyone will leave. I’ll finally take time to read the paper and scour the ads for the Black Friday bargains I plan to get up early for. I look forward to this all year. (Those of you that know me will not be the least bit surprised by this admission.) With list in hand and game plan in mind, my mom and I sneak out before 5:00 am to join the masses of other idiots, in the dark, in search of deals too good to pass up.
Simple traditions but still very near and dear to my heart. So, from my home to yours may your blessings be many and your troubles be few.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Hugs, Reese
Pat Davids and Thanksgiving Memories
After more than fifty years it's hard to pick out Thanksgiving memory out of so many wonderful ones, but I got a chuckle thinking about this one and thought I'd share it with you.
My brothers, all four of them, were hunters. Pheasant, duck, quail, goose. You name it. If it had a season they shot it. One day, just before Thanksgiving, my brother Mark came in with two big geese. Now geese in the wild aren't like the ones that live here in the city and beg for bread crumbs in the park. Bagging a goose takes skill and luck and Mark had TWO.
Thanksgiving was at our house that year and Mom decided to cook the geese instead of the usual turkey. I admit they smelled good as they roasted throughout the morning. When everyone was assembled at the table, my mother brought them in. My brother Mark watched with pride as his trophies came to the table. After cautioning everyone to watch out for buckshot, mom carved them up.
My grandpa, as the oldest, got the first piece. He took a bite and nearly pulled his dentures out. After mulling his mouthful for a while, he gulped and looked at Mark. "You didn't shoot these."
"But I did," Mark insisted.
By this time we were all trying to eat the tougher-than-boot-leather birds and not having much success.
"Nope," said Grandpa, pushing his meat to the side of the plate. "This one died of old age when your gunshot scared him to death."
We all laughed but I did feel bad for Mark and my mom. Thank goodness there was plenty of side dishes to go around and plenty of pumpkin pie to fill us up. No one when away hungry, but goose was never on the menu at our house again.
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