For Her (Melissa Robbins)

At the beginning of this month, I was unsure what to blog about.  The other WARA ladies posted about their value, passions, etc.  I thought about discussing my goals for the year.  Then, on January 11th, my entire world turned upside down.  My youngest, who would have turned three this week, died suddenly.  As I write this, we still don’t know what happened or why.  It’s one thing to write about mysteries.  It’s another thing entirely to live it. 

I can’t bring myself to get up at 5 am and write, but here’s the deal.  There were times when I wrote on my computer instead of snuggling with my little girl while she watched her favorite show, Team Umizoomi or played ponies.  Times I will never get back. 

I know I can’t wave a magic wand over my story and get it published, but fear of sending out queries always held me back.  No more fears.  I owe it to my little girl to get my book published or go down fighting.  Then those missed opportunities won’t be wasted. 

I’m holding my writer friends accountable to nag me to edit my story, to enter contests, and get out those queries. 


Pat Davids said...

I will indeed nag at you to get your writing out into the world. You deserve it.

Now, some advice from an old woman.

Never count the "Oh, I should have moments."

Count instead,
every hug,
every kiss,
every smile you shared,
every giggle,
every scolding you gave,
every time you fastened the carseat
and checked it twice,
every goodnight story you read, every meal you cooked or ran out to bring home,
every dress you washed,
every costume you created,
every stroke of the hairbrush, every bath,
every time you told her you loved her,
every time you rolled your eyes and wondered what she could get into next.
Those moment will add up to 99.9 percent of a child's wonderful life.

Yes, she left you way too soon, but she was loved, and that counts for everything.

Melissa Robbins said...

That is very sweet, Pat. You made me cry.

Reese Mobley said...

Melissa, I can't even imagine what you are going through. It's not right for a parent to have to bury a child, but it happens. And I'm sorry it happened to you.

She was a beautiful child and you'll never forget her smile or her laugh. Her spirit will stay with you for the rest of your life. Tuck these memories close to your heart and she'll always be with you in good times and bad.

Your writing friends will be here for you. If you need a shoulder to cry on or a boot to your hind end, you can count on us.

Penny Rader said...

Oh Melissa, what Pat and Theresa said. I can't say it any better than they did. I'm here if you need me. {{{Hugs}}}}

Joan Vincent said...

My deepest condolences on your loss. Words don't seem appropriate but then they are. For query letters etc. consist of them. I applaud your gutsy response. You've got great stories that will be published.