What is Romance by J Vincent

 The original meaning of romance (Free Dictionary) had nothing to do with love or sex.  A romance (until the modern definition of the word) was a long medieval narrative in prose or verse that tells of the adventures and heroic exploits of chivalric heroes like Arthurian romance.  Or a long fictitious tale of heroes and extraordinary or mysterious events, usually set in a distant time or place.

Today what most think of when hearing the word “romance” include a love affair; ardent emotional attachment or involvement between people; a strong, sometimes short-lived attachment, fascination, or enthusiasm for something.

So what is romance?  Romance is the elaborate dance in which men and women who are attracted to each other for whatever reason, engage. It is the intangible tango of male and female maneuvering; of inexplicable choices; of actions not marred by reality or disillusion. The engagement of the mind, while not completely suspended, is not to reason but to supply the ideas with which to win the object of interest:  It is used to conjure witty conversation, sentimental gifts, pleasing experiences, or tempting adventures. Flirtation with wild swings of emotion is only part of romance.  All of it is the testing grounds by which a person discovers if the other is the “one.”  A romance can be a mating dance, a tango driven by lust, a waltz of desire, a jitterbug of wild give and take, or a free style of harmonious rhythm. It might also be a contest, a battle royal, a joust, a duel, a war.  So many kinds, so little time to get them all written.

If one is lucky, romance leads to love.  Love is what endures after reality intrudes be it in the form of shorts and socks routinely littering the bedroom floor to the realization of far worse flaws.  If one is truly lucky romance lives alongside love as the years go by.  This may mean the adjusting of what we think of as romantic but it still brings the unexpected rose;, or the offer to bath and put the kids to bed when you are nearing the end of your rope, breakfast in bed for no special reason, holding hands when you take a walk, and endless others things that having meaning between a man and a woman.  Romance with love is truly magical.

Has your dear heart done something romantic lately?  We celebrated our 46th anniversary last month.  He melted my heart last week when he used an endearment from when we were dating those eons ago.  I couldn’t even remember the last time he had done so.  Pure romance.  Please share yours.